Archive for the 'Dancing, Clubbing, and Game' Category

Dancing by Yourself

Published
by
Angelo
on April 23, 2009
in Dancing, Clubbing, and Game
. 3 Comments

I totally advocate dancing alone.  I do it all the time and encourage my students  to do so as well.  Now, don’t ignore people (especially girls) that want to dance with you.  What I’m saying is if you don’t have anyone to dance with, then feel free to hit the floor solo.  There is absolutely nothing wrong, odd, or uncomfortable about dancing by yourself.

Dancing is an extroverted activity and can say alot of positive things about your personality.  If people see you dancing alone, smiling, and having a great time they may think you’re confident, carefree, an alpha male, fun, and outgoing.  What guy wouldn’t want a girl thinking these things about him?!  Which brings up another reason to dance solo: to meet chics!

I can’t count the number of times I’ve danced alone and had a girl come up to me to dance.  It’s easier and less threatening for a girl to approach you if you are not dancing in a group.  Put out the vibe that you’re out to have fun and people will pick up on it.  And don’t forget to smile as you’re dancing, it lets everyone know you’re enjoying yourself. 

With dancing solo, strategically placing yourself on the dance floor can make it easier for girls to notice and approach you.  Typically, I’ll dance on the outside perimeter of the floor.  Here I usually have more room to move and can be seen by more people (on and off the floor).  I want girls to know that I’m by myself and available to dance with.   

Where should you look if you don’t have a partner?  If I’m dancing by myself and there is another person(s) on the floor as well, I’ll dance facing their general direction.  That way I can look for approach invitations (invitations from people telling me to approach them).  I don’t stare but I look in their direction, maybe looking at some point behind or around them.  When there’s no one on the floor then I’ll just look around and observe what’s going on.  I won’t face the same direction for too long, I’ll turn my body and look elsewhere - at the Dj, people at the bar, standing around or sitting down.  Just don’t stare.  While I’m dancing I’ll also look for girls that may be watching me, potential targets to approach later.  

As I mentioned earlier, dancing is an extroverted activity.  Most people on the dance floor just want to have a good time and probably couldn’t care less if you’re dancing alone.  So enjoy grooving on your own! 

This topic came as a suggestion from James, who commented on the post “Getting to a Club Early…”  Thanks James and I hope it helps! 

Getting to a Club Early, When it’s Empty

Published
by
Angelo
on April 20, 2009
in Dancing, Clubbing, and Game
. 3 Comments

I’m not a big fan of having to wait too long in line (more than 10 minutes) to get into a venue.  To avoid this I’ll usually arrive early so I don’t have to stand in the queue (and if I have to at least being early puts me closer to the front of the line).  But this post isn’t about waiting in line.  It’s about what to do when you get in early and the place is empty - especially if you’re rolling out solo.

If I’m at a club or lounge that I’ve never been to, then I’ll familiarize myself with the place.  This is important because if you have the intent of meeting a girl or moving her off the dance floor you’ll need to know where to take her.  It’s not a good idea to wander aimlessly through the club with her.  Doing this may make her uncomfortable and she just may change her mind about being with you.

With that in mind, I’ll map out the place in my head: where can we sit and talk where it’s not too loud; is there anywhere to sit that’s not reserved for bottle service; if I need to get a drink, is there a bar that doesn’t get as busy; is there an outdoor patio to cool off and get some air; is there something in the club that would be cool to show the girl.  You get the picture.  Figure out logistics to make getting to know the girl you just met easier.

Having your phone with you can keep you company.  While I’m waiting for things to get bumping I’ll text message people.  Even if I don’t have anyone to text I’ll pretend I’m texting or just go through old messages.  Another thing you can do is pretend you’re talking to someone on the phone (if you’ve no one to call).  Strange I know, but if you’re uncomfortable with being alone at least this gives everyone the impression that you could be waiting for someone.

Getting a drink at the bar and/or chatting up random people (the bartender, barback, other patrons, the Dj, etc.) helps keep you from closing up before the night really gets going.  Just try not to get drunk early!  Seriously, it’s a great idea to get yourself talking early on - it keeps you from getting too much into your head and worrying what other people may be thinking about you.  It’s also a great opportunity to get to know the key employees of the venue, especially the Dj and the doormen.  Knowing them can make it easier to get into the venue in the future.  As an added bonues, you’ll have someone to talk to next time you’re there. 

Avoid sitting down and closing yourself off, mentally and physically.  Mentally, don’t worry about people’s impression of you just because you may be alone.  Chances are you’ll never see them again.  They don’t know if you’ll be by yourself the entire night or if your entourage will be arriving in an hour.  Physically, don’t be afraid to take up room especially if the club is still empty.  If you’re seated at a couch feel free to put your arm(s) on the back of the couch, slouch into the couch more, and even sit with your legs apart.  Convey that you’re comfortable being alone.  But don’t sit there with your eyes closed - people may think you’re sleeping or rolling on something. 

Arriving at a club early and by yourself can be an uncomfortable experience at first but it does get easier.  Eventually you’ll get to a point where you can just grab a drink, take a seat, and chill out by yourself while you wait for the club to go off.

Got questions?  Drop me a comment and I’ll get back to you.  Or if you have any suggestions for future topics, then leave a comment as well.